The Mountain

There are days when I hear people complain and I think to myself, "If I can find reasons to be happy, so can you." I never say it. But sometimes I feel it. And yet...I don't want to make my pain larger than anyone else's. I really don't. I just want people to realize that life is a great, great thing... and we can all gain something from looking for the positives.

There are a lot of things I try to live by.

Life does not always deal us a good hand. Sometimes we have a cross...or many crosses...to bear. And one of the things that helps me most - after the support and love of others has served its purpose and done its good - is to scatter kindness. I want so much to be a light that makes others glow. I don't know if that is a strange goal, but I do know that it makes my life more meaningful and more full of peace.

I miss Rick all the time. I hurt. I cry. I feel distraught. I wonder about things that are less than pleasant. I feel deep loneliness. I struggle to find the energy to do certain things. I am not exempt from pain and agony.

I am not always 100% happy. I don't pretend to be when I'm not.

Some people believe that there are some circumstances that can conquer them. But such circumstances only conquer you if you let them. You don't have to let them. In reality...

I climb a mountain every day. And when I get to the top, I feel spent and tired, but I stand there at the peak and look out over everything that life has to offer. I breathe deeply and make the descent back down to the quiet hours...preparing myself to do it all again.

Don't think about how difficult it is to climb a mountain. Think instead about how awesome it feels looking at the world from the top once you get there.