Over 6 months ago, only 3 months into grief, I wrote that I pictured my heart as a tender onion, layer upon layer upon layer...that the first several layers were ripped and shredded and bruised beyond recognition, but the inner layers leading to the core were strong and resilient, waiting to be seen.
Today, 12 days away from the 10 month mark, I feel remarkably free from the old life I had. It isn't that I want to forget any of the good and bad experiences that made me who I am. But I do want the chance for a new kind of life. The outer layers of the onion that is my heart are no longer ripped and shredded and bruised. They've been ripped away completely and that strong, resilient core is all that's left. My heart beats in a different way now.
And I really like it.
No, I love it.